Surrogacy Options for Gay Couples

Surrogacy, or the use of a third party to carry a pregnancy to term, is a great option in cases where natural pregnancy is not an option for a variety of reasons. Gestational carriers, also known as surrogates, are matched to prospective parents through agencies, or through existing relationships, to provide the highest likelihood of a safe, healthy pregnancy.

While there are no laws in the US prohibiting surrogacy services for gay couples, some states have more progressive laws and views than others, when it comes to LGBTQ+ parenting. We shall explore various surrogacy options that offer a way for gay couples to become parents in this article, as we highlight the processes, legalities, and support systems available for building your family.

What Is Surrogacy?

Surrogacy is the process of an individual carrying a pregnancy to term on behalf of a couple or another individual, when a traditional pregnancy and birth is not a viable option for the potential parent.

People choose surrogacy for a variety of reasons, ranging from infertility or other medical complications, to situations where a traditional pregnancy is simply not possible, as is the case of same sex couples, or individuals, who wish to raise a child on their own.

What is a Gestational Carrier?

A gestational carrier, commonly known as a surrogate, is an individual who carries a pregnancy to term on behalf of the intended parent, or parents. Depending on the chosen method of surrogacy, a surrogate and either - or both - of the intended parents, might be biologically related to the child.

There are several ways in which a gestational carrier can become pregnant, ranging from sexual intercourse to intrauterine insemination (IUI), also known as artificial insemination, and in vitro fertilization (IVF).

For gay couples, IUI and IVF are both common options for surrogacy, which rely either on an egg from the gestational carrier, or a donated egg or embryo from a third party. Sperm can be provided by either one, or both partners. 

Third-party donors can be used in instances where concerns about infertility or hereditary disease prevent either partner from being able to provide a viable sperm sample.

How to Choose a Gestational Carrier

The process of selecting a surrogate can be challenging and is different for every couple. Some prospective parents rely on a friend or family member to carry the pregnancy to term, while others choose to employ one of many third-party service providers to connect them with a viable surrogate. 

Regardless of how a surrogate is identified, there are numerous tests and conditions that must be fulfilled in order to ensure a successful surrogate pregnancy. A number of physical and psychological panels are administered to determine an individual’s suitability to serve as a surrogate. The American Society for Reproductive Medicine has offered a comprehensive list of recommendations for surrogacy, suggesting that strong candidates should meet the following criteria:

• Be between the ages of 21 and 42
• Have a body mass index of under 30
• Be non-smokers without a history of substance use disorder
• Be financially stable and independent
• Have no history of mental health illness or hereditary physical conditions
• Have a history of at least one, but not more than five, successful pregnancies
• Have had fewer than two C-sections
• Live in a state with surrogate-friendly laws

With these stringent suggested guidelines in place for healthy surrogacy, many prospective parents opt for a professional third-party agency to help them find a suitable surrogate. 

Gay Surrogacy Legal Considerations

While surrogacy is legal in most states, some states have more progressive laws than others with regard to LGBTQ+ parenting and adoption regulations. In the United States, surrogacy is legal in every state except Nebraska and Louisiana, where surrogacy itself is legal, but compensated surrogacy is not. 

Since a majority, if not all, surrogacy agencies and service providers compensate gestational carriers for their role in the process, gay couples who are residents of these two states will find it easier to navigate the process outside their home state.

It is important to establish the parameters of surrogacy with the help of legal counsel before the surrogacy process even begins, in order to avoid complications once medical procedures have already begun.

Any surrogacy process should involve a document known as a Gestational Surrogacy Agreement, which outlines the nature of the relationship between the gestational carrier and the intended parents. This includes establishing parental rights for the intended parents, as well as removing the gestational carrier from responsibility for the costs associated with the pregnancy. 

Additionally, in some states, gay parents are able to sign a pre-birth order with their gestational surrogate, in order to have both parents’ names appearing on the birth certificate. Without this pre-birth order, one or both parents may have to go through the adoption process to have full parental rights regarding their child.

It is possible for same sex couples and individuals wishing to raise children on their own to become parents. Surrogacy is a commonly used method toward parenting. 

If you are interested in surrogacy and connecting with the right gestational carrier for you, contact your healthcare provider about the right first steps.

To learn more about family-building options, visit Nevada Fertility Center. We have locations across the country to help navigate the world of family planning.

Gay Surrogacy FAQs

Are Gay Surrogacy/Gestational Carriers Legal in Every State?

While it is legal to use a gestational carrier in every US state, Nebraska and Louisiana prohibit compensation for surrogacy services. 

Can Two Sperms Be Mixed

No. Sperm samples are never mixed during the IVF process. It is possible to use sperm from both partners to fertilize embryos which are then implanted in the gestational carrier’s uterus. Although in some cases it may be more appropriate to select just one partner to donate sperm. 

How Much Does Surrogacy Cost

In general, surrogacy is a fairly expensive process. Surrogacy costs can vary widely from state to state and provider to provider, but prospective parents can expect to spend anywhere from $30,000 to upward of $100,000 over the course of the surrogacy process. 

This typically covers everything from compensation for the gestational carrier to hospital costs for birthing care to IVF fees and many other expenses along the way. Some insurance plans may cover some or all of these expenses, but each person’s situation is unique.